125 Comments

I’m already thinking 🤔 about who will play you in the Mehran movie 🍿 😂

Expand full comment
Oct 16, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

This past June marked 10 years in NYC for me (same apartment in Astoria since 2013) but I would never fool myself into thinking that I had crossed the threshold into real New Yorker territory...

That is, until I SAW FRAN LEBOWITZ ON THE SUBWAY a few weeks ago while it was still boiling hot outside! I was flustered and sweating, waiting for the downtown F, and I see a person in a breezy, sage-colored linen blazer standing a few yards away. I look up and meet the gaze of Fran. Immediately, I put my phone away, as I know she hates technology and smartphones. We get on the same train, kind of stealing glances at each other, and then I get off two stops later. It turned my day — nay, my LIFE — around being blessed with a Fran sighting.

Expand full comment

Mehran shows a bit of casual brilliance here. An inspiration for my winter prank offensive. It’s also deeply amusing that a tech type’s prank would snowball into pop-up sales.

Expand full comment

Loved getting to know Mehran a bit better! What a cool guy. I'd see that movie for sure!

Expand full comment

Okay to relax - problem is inside you 😂

Expand full comment
Oct 16, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

Eaten by fellow passengers (unrelated to disaster).

Expand full comment
founding
Oct 16, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

“In an underground subway disaster I'd be...”

Other: I’d most likely sit still in my seat and watch the chaos unfold, hopefully eliminating the most unhelpful persons, such as the macho-men who watch WWE and old episodes of “Walker Texas Ranger,” the Karen’s, who at a crowded deli counter think it is their right to sample taste a slice of cheese or lunch-meat and then order a ¼ pound of about 100 meats and cheeses; you know, any human being, not me.

After a bit I would either pretend to be dead and wait for the all-clear, or try to encourage the maniac with a gun/knife/uranium to go ahead and kill me because I have a million dollar life insurance policy that pays triple for subway disasters and they’d be doing my family a huge favor. It’s just like when I was a hospital pharmacist and I often role-played that if I was confronted with a robber who wanted drugs that I’d act like I was expecting them; like I was in on the scheme! When pushed, pull, and when pulled, push. Throw them off!!

Expand full comment

What a nice recap --

(1) Voted Other -- Relieved I rode my bicycle today is the CORRECT ANSWER

(2) LOVED the Zoom split screen -- Mehran is a talk with your hands guy -- the best ; you look like you swallowed a secret and are fighting back laughter -- great

(3) <<Yeah. But the New York Post and Daily Mail had the most absurd, crazy comments like, "Oh, a bunch of liberals pranking a bunch of liberals—nothing better than that!” Or, "Oh, this is what a Biden country looks like!" Or, "This is being celebrated in the media because the media is also in the business of fooling people." How does everything become a proxy war for other issues?>> This brings to mind one of my favored observations -- anger and bitterness in the end destroys the source -- bitter is the worst of the tastebuds and holds true for the emotions also -- when you feel it gurgling up, it is time to check yourself and do something else!!!

(4) The handful of people who reversed their credit card fees -- brings to mind a number of years ago when the NFL instituted rules LIMITING CELEBRATIONS -- some of the pundits started referring to the NFL as the NO FUN LEAGUE -- haha

Expand full comment
Oct 16, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

I'd absolutely watch that movie. What an amazing slice of life I wouldn't have ever known about otherwise. Again, thank you for sharing that story.

Expand full comment
Oct 16, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

Subway disasters spike my adrenaline. I'd be ripping out seats to repurpose as canes just in case, or fantasizing about the same while listening (key skill for this Quiet type) to another adrenalized NYer with a tendancy to talk their way through anything! And I would also question alpha orders I didn't agree with, and suggest alternatives, all the while appearing cooperative because at the end of the day I'm a pragmatist. And, I trust we would get enough of the right information between all of us to make it out.

Expand full comment

Omg I love this guy Mehran & his vision & his spirit is chef's kiss! As an old-timer who has spent a lot of time doing & thinking abt pranks, what Mehran & his friends achieved is next level & imho automatically places them in the pantheon of All Time Greats! And thank you Anne for bringing this story to life for all of us - pretty sure you're the only writer in the world who could've done this story justice & illuminated all the levels & joy & humanity in this unforgettable narrative. Bravo.✨

Expand full comment
Oct 17, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

SUBWAY: Years ago I discovered it's not possible to hyperventilate and hum at the same time, so I'd be softly humming my fave hymns along w Leonard Cohen''s Suzanne. Great stress buster for me.

Expand full comment
Oct 17, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

SUBWAY: I'd be softly humming my fave hymns, eyes open but not in focus. [Years ago, when very anxious about something, and thus hyperventilating making matters worse, I discovered it's not possible to hum and hyperventilate at the same time. Works like magic for me to this day.]

Expand full comment
founding
Oct 17, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

Wow your interview with Miss Dore was every bit as good as your newsletter. It really revealed you as a person, but it also reinforced the image of you that I gleaned from your writings. You are a very positive person, yet you can use the f-word as well as any sailor; and just as appropriately! That's a complete person in my book!

I'd have say that your smile is genuine and that opens the door to engaging with strangers.

"I just accept that I'm scared and do it anyway." Just terrific advice. Everyone is scared; so what!! Do it anyway!

"My intuition responds best when I try to consider every person's welfare." You're going to have change the name of the newsletter to "Cafe Mary Poppins!" Just teasing. Your consideration for others comes through.

"What helped me get over my shyness was drinking."

I swore no personal stories, but back in the day I had no problem phoning a girl I didn't know to go out with me. But I needed help from a shot of bourbon, first. I mean I'd be using the phone in the hallway of the guy's dorm, with all those Neanderthals listening in and laughing and sh-t; I mean that's pressure. They still tease me because my opening gambit was always the same: "Hi, you don't know me but we met at the (dance, cafeteria, library, AA Meeting, back of the sheriff's cruiser, yada, yada, yada...). Most times the girl pictured someone other than me, and that lucky mistake was just grand.

"But I'm not sorry about all the drinking I did!"

Me either; except if it was methanol or antifreeze.

"I'm on their side! I think people can sense that."

Yes!!!

"People live up to your expectations. If you expect folks to be decent and kind, that's what you get."

I'm skeptical, but I fear you may be right. I think you may have a way to go to convince Aharon.

"When you think about it, almost every occupation requiring serious focus and dedication—cop, nun, nurse, soldier—comes with a uniform."

I never thought about it but you're exactly right! You know, reading and commenting on Cafe Anne requires serious focus and dedication. Maybe your audience needs a uniform?! https://youtu.be/3bXEHGUvVrA?si=_B7Ft9FJKLJDz8oy

"When I am talking to a stranger, I have no idea who they are or what they might say. Anything could happen"

I totally agree. Usually a stranger will mention something that triggers a memory in me and that will trigger something conversational in the stranger. Like, "My mom made the best Sloppy Joes!" which could lead just about anywhere!

"My sister and I like to say, "A rich tapestry!" and we laugh and laugh."

Now that is amusing, and a tad sarcastic! My best friend and I like to say, "You gotta be nice to strangers even when they are the worst, because they don't know you well enough to understand how 'Shut your big face!' can mean 'I've missed you more than the whole world can know.'

Expand full comment
Oct 17, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

As Cindy Adams says: Only in New York, kids, only in New York.

Expand full comment

The subway game is like an adult Eye Spy. Rob should package the idea and sell it to Hasbro. Maybe I missed this but did the department of health ever fine Mehren? I would think the fake steakhouse would have been a big ouchy for them.

Expand full comment