Is Anne Kadet the Dave Portnoy of bad pizza? Maybe the anti-Dave Portnoy is more apt. In any event, I have to believe there are worse slices to be found in the city, though probably not for 5 bucks. Props to Refaat Soliman for speaking with you and you for asking to speak to him. I hope the Georgia family finds themselves a good slice.
Hahahahaha!!! Of course it reminds me of Quantitative Analysis Lab back in '73 and having two small beakers, one filled with water and one filled with nitric acid and not knowing which was which; so having 1 1/2 years of college ejumication behind me, I smartly thought to sniff it instead of drink it and my nose hairs spontaneously combusted from the nitric acid; lucky to live & learn!
I have never been to the Metrograph, Andrew, but am looking now and they are showing all these great old movies. It looks like a great deal if you go often enough that the membership thing makes sense.
Yeah I've actually been thinking about reviewing movie theatres across various metrics and seating will be a while hullabaloo because I neither enjoy the premium La-Z-Boy seating nor cheap back-killing seating so most best scoring theatres for seating would be good to be unremarkable.
i can immediately remember my shittiest movie experience - both AC was broken in the summer, and the movie was incredibly extra loud. people were getting refunds because of how hot it was, yet for some reason my friends and i stuck it out. we did ask a couple times for the sound to be lowered, to no avail.
“Atmosphere is like the waiting room of a lawyer who never wins.”
That cuts! Almost as good as a British insult…
Dominos and these TS pizza places because Ohio exists and we send people over to visit and live in NYC. It’s the acquired bad pizza taste that will never not be profitable. 🤪
Oh that's an interesting idea that not just the TS places but the Domino's in NYC are supported by tourists, Gerard.
We have about 100 chain pizzera locations total in NYC out of more than 2000 pizzeria, so the chains are only .05% of the total. I bet that's way fewer than most towns.
This was just so delightful to read and drove home the key point that the pizza you can get in NYC is better than 95% of the pizza you can get anywhere else in the country.
That is true, Emily, and I should note that A Slice of New York really is a classic NYC slice. Thin crust, on the crispy side, light cheese and sauce, very foldable. With a ton of red pepper, garlic and salt sprinkled on, you've got something!
I grew up in the NYC area and now live in Massachusetts north of Boston. Even the worst NYC pizza is infinitely better than the soggy, flaccid "pizza" we get up here. The crust is thick and tastes like undercooked bread, the sauce is weirdly sweet, and if you don't watch them carefully, they try to sneak cheddar cheese on it.
I appreciate the stats at the bottom of this. Queens has amazing food.... I wonder why the pizza is so bad!! Also, have you heard of the pizza mafia? My dad, who moved here in the 80s, says that at the time you could only buy your dough and sauce from one supplier, and if you refused, they burned your shop down. He says he saw this happen! Is this real???
I can't say why the Queens pizza scores so poorly, Emma. But now that I think of it, I have NEVER heard anyone say that their favorite pizzeria is in Queens, while plenty will cite a favorite place in Manhattan, Brooklyn or Staten Island. So maybe it's just a matter of Queens not being so bad, but simply not having any of the blow-out top locations to lift the average up?
Although I have favorite pizzerias in each borough, my favorite slice shop anywhere is in Queens! New Park Pizza on Cross Bay Boulevard is a gem and always has been!
I think that part of having good pizza is finding a place when you need it, while walking by. Because Queens is very sprawling, there isn't as much of a need for quick and delicious portable food. Perhaps geography is part of why we haven't excelled
I had the same thought, but my theory is that the Italians have spread to other boroughs, so Queens has the best of all other foods in the world beside pizza. We had to give the other boroughs SOMETHING
I'm thinking of applying, Jo, even though I'm not age-qualified and don't really like kids. I know the mom who placed the ad, and she's a super-cool lady that anyone would be lucky to hang out with.
Not old enough to be a granny? What nonsense! I was 43 when I became a grandfather and am still waiting at 81 to be a great-grandfather. We could afford to breed like rabbits. Sadly those days have gone. For the record 30-something grandkids are far better than toddlers. The high point was in 2007 when our eldest granddaughter picked up the tab for lunch. Get in there gal! They will be adults working for Cafe Anne before you know it.🐰
I keeping forgetting I live in a weird part of NYC where most of the folks having their first kid are literally old enough to be grandparents! It's NOT NORMAL!
Representing the West Coast in wanting the best NY bagel review. I’m always on the search for the perfect bagel. Of course it has to be close by because who wants to travel far for coffee and bagel in the morning? So,maybe a list like the excellent one on Pizza ( duly noted and copied for my next NY trip). Im old enough to be a grandma but would rather just be friends with the grandma seeking couple. They sound so cool. I’d love to read a follow up on their ad and see how it turned out for them. Thanks for a great newsletter.
A minor correction: Jonathan the tortoise was born in the Seychelles, but has lived on St. Helena (the south Atlantic island) for 140 years or so. I know this because I spent some time this morning planning my trip to St. Helena next summer, during which I'll hopefully be able to meet him in person.
This article came at just the right time! I was touring a big group of Cali students through Santa Barbara last week where I encountered some of the worst pizza i've ever had. I politely ate it while feeling bad about them having to eat that for dinner but they LOVED it! We truly are blessed to live in a city where even the worst pizza still isn't too bad. Thanks for sharing!
Haha! Can I ask where you went, Sadie? I live in Santa Barbara and as I was reading this post I was thinking, I'm sure I would think this "worst" pizza is perfectly fine relative to my town's offerings.
More pizza in Dumbo/BK heights than the west village has to be one of the most unintuitive stats about NYC I've ever heard. If you wrote it I'm sure it's true but... my God. Doing a mental inventory of those two areas I can think of a handful in Heights/Dumbo and a genuinely bottomless assortment in the village. On my mother's block you can get to 2 without crossing the street (and she does not live on MacDougal or Carmine or Sixth Ave or somewhere totally obvious for this).
I live in the area so no surprise for me, Larrando. There's that whole tourist cluster in Dumbo inspired by Grimaldi's and all the knock-offs, then a whole bunch of other pricy places on Atlantic and Henry and Hicks. And good old Monty Q's on Montague. And the cheapie places on Court for the government employees. We have ALL the pizzas.
Is Anne Kadet the Dave Portnoy of bad pizza? Maybe the anti-Dave Portnoy is more apt. In any event, I have to believe there are worse slices to be found in the city, though probably not for 5 bucks. Props to Refaat Soliman for speaking with you and you for asking to speak to him. I hope the Georgia family finds themselves a good slice.
Looking up Dave Portnoy...Oh that guy! No, I'm far too lazy to be that guy, Rob, haha.
And yes, I am fan of Refaat Soliman. Very cool fellow!
How has no-one yet said worst coffee?
ERIC that is an excellent point! That would be SO FUN!!!! Plus I'd get to drink MORE COFFEE.
Because if the coffee isn’t strong enough to strip the seasoning off a cast iron pan, my sister won’t like it!
Pass the H3PO4 with some half-and-half please.
Hahahahaha!!! Of course it reminds me of Quantitative Analysis Lab back in '73 and having two small beakers, one filled with water and one filled with nitric acid and not knowing which was which; so having 1 1/2 years of college ejumication behind me, I smartly thought to sniff it instead of drink it and my nose hairs spontaneously combusted from the nitric acid; lucky to live & learn!
You know my favorite sign from the No Kings Protest? "JD Vance puts his cast iron frying pan in the dishwasher."
"I found it and I ate it" is something my dog used to do all of the time!
Yes Micheal that would be the official Canine Theme Song
That was a great heading!!
I would love for you to see a movie in the lowest-rated theater in the city :)
Haha this is a GREAT IDEA Emily. There is nothing shittier than a shitty movie theater!!!
i can help field test! also movie theaters can be shitty for different reasons. is it the building itself? projection quality? audiences?
like I really dislike the Metrograph because the seats insanely uncomfortable but it has a 4.6.
I have never been to the Metrograph, Andrew, but am looking now and they are showing all these great old movies. It looks like a great deal if you go often enough that the membership thing makes sense.
Yeah I've actually been thinking about reviewing movie theatres across various metrics and seating will be a while hullabaloo because I neither enjoy the premium La-Z-Boy seating nor cheap back-killing seating so most best scoring theatres for seating would be good to be unremarkable.
Oh, that's a good one. Just make sure to take off your clothes and bag them immediately upon entering your apartment, Anne, so you avoid bedbugs.
Haha do you remember the bed bug problem at the Pavilion in Park Slope?
oh yes! And when I go to the nitehawk there I still worry about residual bedbugs!
i can immediately remember my shittiest movie experience - both AC was broken in the summer, and the movie was incredibly extra loud. people were getting refunds because of how hot it was, yet for some reason my friends and i stuck it out. we did ask a couple times for the sound to be lowered, to no avail.
“Atmosphere is like the waiting room of a lawyer who never wins.”
That cuts! Almost as good as a British insult…
Dominos and these TS pizza places because Ohio exists and we send people over to visit and live in NYC. It’s the acquired bad pizza taste that will never not be profitable. 🤪
Oh that's an interesting idea that not just the TS places but the Domino's in NYC are supported by tourists, Gerard.
We have about 100 chain pizzera locations total in NYC out of more than 2000 pizzeria, so the chains are only .05% of the total. I bet that's way fewer than most towns.
This was just so delightful to read and drove home the key point that the pizza you can get in NYC is better than 95% of the pizza you can get anywhere else in the country.
That is true, Emily, and I should note that A Slice of New York really is a classic NYC slice. Thin crust, on the crispy side, light cheese and sauce, very foldable. With a ton of red pepper, garlic and salt sprinkled on, you've got something!
I grew up in the NYC area and now live in Massachusetts north of Boston. Even the worst NYC pizza is infinitely better than the soggy, flaccid "pizza" we get up here. The crust is thick and tastes like undercooked bread, the sauce is weirdly sweet, and if you don't watch them carefully, they try to sneak cheddar cheese on it.
Bad Bagel Bash!
There are many ways to do bagels badly, and not so many ways to do them well. (Kind of the opposite of pizza.)
That's three votes now for worst bagel shop!
Find the worst "skrown" shop!!
I appreciate the stats at the bottom of this. Queens has amazing food.... I wonder why the pizza is so bad!! Also, have you heard of the pizza mafia? My dad, who moved here in the 80s, says that at the time you could only buy your dough and sauce from one supplier, and if you refused, they burned your shop down. He says he saw this happen! Is this real???
I can't say why the Queens pizza scores so poorly, Emma. But now that I think of it, I have NEVER heard anyone say that their favorite pizzeria is in Queens, while plenty will cite a favorite place in Manhattan, Brooklyn or Staten Island. So maybe it's just a matter of Queens not being so bad, but simply not having any of the blow-out top locations to lift the average up?
Although I have favorite pizzerias in each borough, my favorite slice shop anywhere is in Queens! New Park Pizza on Cross Bay Boulevard is a gem and always has been!
This review my wife and I wrote is over a decade old, but New Park is still great: https://web.archive.org/web/20141104121310/http://www.passion-4-pizza.com/queens-pizza.html
Note: On the way back from the cemetery after my mother's funeral, my brothers and I got the limo driver to stop at New Park for a slice.
Aha! CL, we were talking in an earlier thread about how no on says their favorite NYC pizzeria is a Queens pizzeria and you just proved us wrong.
Then my work is done.
Amore Pizza in Whitestone at Linden Place is a classic
I think that part of having good pizza is finding a place when you need it, while walking by. Because Queens is very sprawling, there isn't as much of a need for quick and delicious portable food. Perhaps geography is part of why we haven't excelled
I had the same thought, but my theory is that the Italians have spread to other boroughs, so Queens has the best of all other foods in the world beside pizza. We had to give the other boroughs SOMETHING
That sounds about right, Emily. Queens probably does have the best everything else.
I wish I lived in Brooklyn- I’d adore to be that granny….
I'm thinking of applying, Jo, even though I'm not age-qualified and don't really like kids. I know the mom who placed the ad, and she's a super-cool lady that anyone would be lucky to hang out with.
Not old enough to be a granny? What nonsense! I was 43 when I became a grandfather and am still waiting at 81 to be a great-grandfather. We could afford to breed like rabbits. Sadly those days have gone. For the record 30-something grandkids are far better than toddlers. The high point was in 2007 when our eldest granddaughter picked up the tab for lunch. Get in there gal! They will be adults working for Cafe Anne before you know it.🐰
So funny O.L.O.
I keeping forgetting I live in a weird part of NYC where most of the folks having their first kid are literally old enough to be grandparents! It's NOT NORMAL!
Representing the West Coast in wanting the best NY bagel review. I’m always on the search for the perfect bagel. Of course it has to be close by because who wants to travel far for coffee and bagel in the morning? So,maybe a list like the excellent one on Pizza ( duly noted and copied for my next NY trip). Im old enough to be a grandma but would rather just be friends with the grandma seeking couple. They sound so cool. I’d love to read a follow up on their ad and see how it turned out for them. Thanks for a great newsletter.
Toni, I agree, location is super important in a bagel shop, even more than pizza.
And I am for sure planning to do a story on the grandma search if something comes of it (and the family agrees).
Oh yes I’d adore a follow-up! They sound fab
The post office with the most unfriendliest or rudest customer service
Oh good one Debbie!
Absolutely hilarious and what a great attitude he had about his bad pizza. My favorite part of this was the ad for a grandma! What a delightful idea!
I am very psyched about the "grandma" ad too, Claire. I can't wait to see what happens!
A minor correction: Jonathan the tortoise was born in the Seychelles, but has lived on St. Helena (the south Atlantic island) for 140 years or so. I know this because I spent some time this morning planning my trip to St. Helena next summer, during which I'll hopefully be able to meet him in person.
Thank you Dwight, I will fix!
And when you meet Jonathan, please give him my regards!
This article came at just the right time! I was touring a big group of Cali students through Santa Barbara last week where I encountered some of the worst pizza i've ever had. I politely ate it while feeling bad about them having to eat that for dinner but they LOVED it! We truly are blessed to live in a city where even the worst pizza still isn't too bad. Thanks for sharing!
That's so funny Sadie. And it's true there is something about the experience of even a bad NYC slice and that is just universally delightful.
Haha! Can I ask where you went, Sadie? I live in Santa Barbara and as I was reading this post I was thinking, I'm sure I would think this "worst" pizza is perfectly fine relative to my town's offerings.
“Even bad pizza is still good” 100% AGREE
Esp when you add tons of salt and half a jar of red pepper flakes on top!
More pizza in Dumbo/BK heights than the west village has to be one of the most unintuitive stats about NYC I've ever heard. If you wrote it I'm sure it's true but... my God. Doing a mental inventory of those two areas I can think of a handful in Heights/Dumbo and a genuinely bottomless assortment in the village. On my mother's block you can get to 2 without crossing the street (and she does not live on MacDougal or Carmine or Sixth Ave or somewhere totally obvious for this).
I live in the area so no surprise for me, Larrando. There's that whole tourist cluster in Dumbo inspired by Grimaldi's and all the knock-offs, then a whole bunch of other pricy places on Atlantic and Henry and Hicks. And good old Monty Q's on Montague. And the cheapie places on Court for the government employees. We have ALL the pizzas.
Not libraries! Leave them alone! How about bagel shops?
That's two votes for bagel shops!
But I'm so tempted by libraries...weirdly because I love libraries!