73 Comments

Beautiful Roulette stories -- thank you Anne. Your big heart really comes through in these!

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Thank you Carrie! I always have so much fun with these conversations and am amazed by what folks will share.

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I really loved how the social worker was completely certain he was mostly good. We are so often our own worst critics, so it was refreshing to know he feels solidly good about his contributions to the world. I aspire to that!

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Right? He did not skip a beat before tossing out "90." I aspire as well!

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Aug 7, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

“It was my first date. I was 16.”

What a coincidence: Joyce is 69 and had her 1st date at 16!! Me too (although I’ll be 70 in another week, the 17th; this photo was from a wedding 2 days ago and if I must say, I’m not doing too badly…and it wasn’t from clean livin’...just luck and genetics) https://drive.google.com/file/d/1joWAZIr0OAhJqn6DM-fkXpr-kh2L_3d4/view?usp=sharing

“…she stole him away from me…I was crushed at the time.”

No, Anne, losing your boyfriend at 16 is NOT better than later in life…Oppenheimer himself had a theory on that, E = mc16 that says breaking up at 16 is the equivalent of 50 tons of dynamite exploding in your heart!!

I certainly hope that Joyce put a curse on that girl!! https://youtu.be/O66m3X5mYpU

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Wow, looking good JRB!

And you're right...things DO hurt a lot more when you're 16.

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Everyone looks good in sunglasses!

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Agreed. I love them so much! You can learn something from everyone, and this is such a great example of that.

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Thank you Tina, it really is true, that you can learn from everybody. Including, sometimes, what NOT to do!

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Aug 7, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

“…start cooking and taking care of my grandmother. I’d toilet her, stuff like that. Shave my father. So I guess that would be an example of something that I did that was good.”

Well Vincent, even St. Francis didn’t toilet his grandmother or shave his father…he didn’t even clean up after the squirrels and cows. St. Peter is at the Pearly Gates right now with an electric unicycle that can go 45 mph so that you can dash through into an eternity of indescribable fun! Good man!

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From what I recall, St. Francis did not have a great relationship with his folks at all, right? Wasn't he sort of a-hole crazy rebel, before the squirrel thing and the bird thing?

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Aug 7, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

YOU'RE RIGHT!!! He was a real sob before he went saint-crazy...they almost walled him off at a cathedral...

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I love the “people are generally good” response from Vincent. I remember someone saying “we have to get through life with a big degree of trust that people are good, otherwise we won’t be able to survive a day. The food/coffee you order from a cafe or restaurant require you to trust that the person making it won’t poison you, or the direction you ask the stranger for, you have to trust that they’re not leading you astray, or the taxi driver won’t kidnap you, etc..” This verified it to me: how much of our interactions are based on trust? Otherwise we won’t live a day. People are generally good, and you’re on of them. Thank you Anne!

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Thanks Abdulrahman. I love your comment. We always think about trust in terms of our family or friendship or business relationships. I've never stopped to think—until reading what you wrote—how many times a day I am trusting strangers. To the point where I am really putting my life in their hands. It's pretty remarkable!

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Ooooh, I love this one! What beautiful souls you found! I kept thinking, this one is my favorite! And then I'd read the next and think, no, this one is my favorite. So I guess they're all my favorites!

And, of course, I love Ben. When I lived on Stanton Street, Buster the pigeon used to visit me every day, strutting along the ledge for hours. He and my kitty Hank had a love affair through the window!

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Thanks Jane. They're all my favorite too. :)

Very cool about Buster and Hank. I love hearing about inter-species friendships (or in this case, a love affair). So amazing!

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To be the love of one’s own life seems both an obvious and impossible goal

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That is true but I think it also depends on one defines oneself. One of my favorite phrases: "The whole universe is my true personality."

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Based on Eddie's "permanent New Yorker status," I would love to know seniors' thoughts on what makes you a true New Yorker. Is it passing a certain number of years? A particular experience or realization? Maybe a question to add for SCR #5!

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Rebecca, I love these questions and will add to the list for sure. Thank you!

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Wow, this was my first Senior Citizen Roulette, and I loved it! When I have time I will definitely go back and read more in the archives. I've been on fence about subscribing (never having lived in a a real city, much less New York) but this one did it for me, off I go to subscribe.!

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Wow thank you for subscribing Louisa, even though you are not NYC. Please make sure to send me your address so I can mail your surprise item!

Here are the three previous rounds:

https://annekadet.substack.com/p/scrthree

https://annekadet.substack.com/p/scr2

https://annekadet.substack.com/p/scr?s=w

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Everything you create here is sublime. Thanks so much

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Awww thank you Lewis. So glad you enjoyed!

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Aug 7, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

Can u host a meetup for the hiding under the bed people

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LOL

I believe the meetup is happening right now under your bed randa!

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Aug 7, 2023·edited Aug 7, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

Anne -- Special post today! Your interviewing talent and joy is OOTW. I love that you share, piece by piece, a bit of yourself. Going to a doubleheader of movies was hard to step out into pop culture. Your Substack is special because, based, upon the poll, your readers self-identify with the author!!!

Pigeon : Alliteration always funny (Ben Bogle). You used my favorite word I learned in the Cafe (busker)

Roulette : Your interviews are incredible (1) Vincent -- well-adjusted optimist (2) Sam -- self-aware observer (3) Trudy -- happy & enjoying the ride (4) Joyce -- make your mistakes early (5) Abbott -- small regrets & big joy is a strong combo (6) Eddie -- knowledge=bragging AWESOME

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Thank you Mr. Dolan!

And I didn't think of it, but yes, Abbott's regret, though it really struck me at the time, is very minor in the grand scheme of things, isn't it. There was a lot of material I left out but from what he told me, it sounded like he had a very long and happy marriage.

May all our regrets be minor!

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My dad has this almost identical regret about my mom. It plagues him. He mentions it often!

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That is sweet but sad, Jane. I hope your mom knew.

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I hope so, too!

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Aug 8, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

I've been retired for 3 years now. The biggest revelation is that no matter how beautiful, intelligent (except for one crucially bad decision) and fun I'd thought my wife, Patty was from the time we met until now, the calm of retirement has revealed that she is more beatiful, intelligent and fun than I ever realized. I tell her that everyday and pinch myself at my good luck. I'm sure you guessed at her one bad decision: it was a doozy...me...

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That’s so lovely! Haha. I didn’t guess. And I’m certain it’s not true.

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Aug 7, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

“Ben Bogle”

That’s not his real name! That’s “Blake Blaze” and his claim to fame was a cameo appearance in the movie “Dazed and Confused,” though if you blink you’ll miss him: he flies by at the 2:12 mark, right when McConaughey says, “Hey, how ya doin’?”

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Your Bogle humor is boggling Mr. Bean

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Aug 7, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

Marc Rebillet has been a pigeon this whole time?? :D A Cafe Anne piece on Marc would be great! p.s. Loved Eddie!

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Haha I am so busted! I always wonder how often folks make these connections. And you're right—that would be a fun piece.

Also, yes, Eddie is very cool. :)

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Oh my!! I didn't even realize! I love Marc's busking series in the city --would love to know how he navigates it all!

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Aug 7, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

Senior Citizen Roulette is GREAT! I love that this is a thing you do. What a great way to talk to people who others may pass in the street, gathering bits of wisdom and some genuine belly laughs.

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Thank you Justin. It's a total gimmick but it does seem to work a lot of time. I think because they are not MY questions or MY answers. I'm just the go-between. I'm not even deciding who answers which question. What happens is totally out of my control!

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Aug 7, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

“So the question is—this is about our mayors—who is more weird, Eric Adams or Ed Koch?”

BECAUSE you made the error of mentioning Ed Koch, I have to tell this story…AGAIN! Back in the 1980’s, before Google was even a twinkle in Barbenheimer’s eye, my dad, retired, came up with the idea that he wanted a hotdog cart, to sell hotdogs in downtown Youngstown at lunchtime. BUT, he didn’t know where to buy the cart; so he wrote a letter to Ed Koch, since NYC had thousands of hot carts! AND, Ed Koch wrote back with the contact information to purchase one; the letter is saved as a part of family lore. Dad contacted a few of the vendors, but the idea only went as far as the rusty, wobbly metal grill on the side of the house. He’d gladly sell you a hotdog if you wandered up the driveway.

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I don't know what is more amazing, JRB, the fact that Koch replied with contact information, or that your dad thought to bug the mayor of NYC about his hot dog cart quandary in the first place. The best part, of course, is that your dad did not bother following through. So great!

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Aug 7, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

My teeny tiny claim to fame is that the former owner of my NY apartment was Ed Koch's sister.

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So funny!

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Aug 9, 2023·edited Aug 9, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

"Who or what is the love of my life? Me!" THIS recalls a little ditty my Dad a coach and teacher sarcastically assailed me with whenever i got too cocky:

"I like me...i think i'm grand

i go to the movies and hold my hand.

i put my arm around my waist...

and when i get fresh... i SLAP my face!"

also the pigeon...yessss always the pigeon:

ever see that cartoon "a birds-eye view of the world?" its basically a view looking down thru trees of the intersecting lines of a scope zeroed in on top of unsuspecting human head below

thats all i got

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First time I've read Senior Citizen Roulette, Anne and it is absolutely magnificent. Marginally concerned though that I more than qualify as a senior myself and that I therefore ought to be wiser than I am. Can I ask how old you are?

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So glad you enjoyed SCR Fiona! I am 51. I wonder how one might determine how wise they are relative to their peers?

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Hard to tell. I would imagine a certain brightness of eye rather than a blank expression might be encouraging?

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Aug 13, 2023Liked by Anne Kadet

I loved the Roulette stories (again). But I have to go now and order an AR salad spinner.

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Thanks Will! And I know it will all be worth it when you sit down to enjoy your AR salad.

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Love those oldsters 🧓🏽👴🏿👵!

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Thanks Nick! Me too!!

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Fabulous questions for roulette, loved the answers. Thank you!

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Yay! So happy you enjoyed!

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