“One of my favorite pastimes is deliberately mispronouncing words. This is partially to test the person I am conversing with—will they let it slide?”
OMG!!! ME TOO!” I was a hospital pharmacist for 44 years and I would deliberately mispronounce words! Remember the movie “16 Candles” with Molly Ringwald? There was a character in that movie nicknamed “Farmer Ted.” So, after I saw the movie, instead of answering the phone, “Pharmacy, Frank Dundee speaking,” I’d answer it “Farmer Ted, Frank Dundee speaking!” In 20 phone calls, only one person said, “Farmer Ted?!”
ANOTHER STORY: The telephone operators at the hospital would page people overhead and this one day they announced, about 10 times, “Can a member of the “Anne Limbian” family call the Surgery Waiting Area?” So, I call the operator and ask, “Are you looking for a member of the amphibian family?” And the operator said, “NO!!! The Anne LIMBian family!!” And I said, “Oh, I thought maybe you wanted a turtle or an alligator to call the Surgery Waiting Area!” Then I said, “Oh! That’s VERY different! Never-mind,” like Emily Litella. https://youtu.be/OjYoNL4g5Vg
I’ll bet the counter-help who knew you meant “scone” were experienced in retail bakery and realized that most people are goofs and they get the person exactly what they want but can’t pronounce. That was just so fun to hear about!
“One of my favorite pastimes is deliberately mispronouncing words. This is partially to test the person I am conversing with—will they let it slide?”
OMG!!! ME TOO!” I was a hospital pharmacist for 44 years and I would deliberately mispronounce words! Remember the movie “16 Candles” with Molly Ringwald? There was a character in that movie nicknamed “Farmer Ted.” So, after I saw the movie, instead of answering the phone, “Pharmacy, Frank Dundee speaking,” I’d answer it “Farmer Ted, Frank Dundee speaking!” In 20 phone calls, only one person said, “Farmer Ted?!”
ANOTHER STORY: The telephone operators at the hospital would page people overhead and this one day they announced, about 10 times, “Can a member of the “Anne Limbian” family call the Surgery Waiting Area?” So, I call the operator and ask, “Are you looking for a member of the amphibian family?” And the operator said, “NO!!! The Anne LIMBian family!!” And I said, “Oh, I thought maybe you wanted a turtle or an alligator to call the Surgery Waiting Area!” Then I said, “Oh! That’s VERY different! Never-mind,” like Emily Litella. https://youtu.be/OjYoNL4g5Vg
What an epic packed Monday morning Cafe Anne. The fire department fire escape is something I'm familiar with. Although it does look wacky, high rise apartment buildings are fire resistant. If a fire breaks out in someones residence, the fire should stay contained to that section until the FD shows up. That's of course not always the case like if someone leaves their door open and it gets out into the hallway (the Bronx deadly fire recently was a good example of this). I don't think I've seen too many escapes like that in NJ but it another resource for residence. Happy Monday!
“Those aren’t window cages. They’re fire escapes—from one apartment to the other,” she said.
OMG that is genius!! It just might provide an escape route during a fire!! Reminds me of when my brother went to college at Duquesne University, perched high on a cliff above the Monongahela River, or one of the other “Three Rivers” Pittsburghers are so gott-damned proud of! My brother was on the 20th floor of a high rise, right over the cliff; and my mom suggested we purchase a rope-ladder to send him off with, you know just in case of fire and you wanted to fall 10 to 15 feet less on your cascade from 20 stories and then bouncing off the rocks on the cliff before final entry into ONE of the gott-damned Three-Rivers!! LOL!!!
Deliberate mispronunciation is such a great idea! Thank you for this inspiring email. I am already considering ways to add this to my life.
Do you ever let on that it's deliberate or acknowledge the true pronunciation when someone points it out, or do you just pretend that they didn't say anything? Do you argue that you're correct? How does it typically play out when you get pushback?
I'm leaning more toward something like, "Oh really? In Serbia we say it _____." And then when I eventually accidentally run into a Serbian, I'll just claim that I said Siberian, and am specifically referring to aboriginal Siberian and not Russian. Do you speak it? Holuchnik!"
When I first read “SKWON,” in my head it was “SKWAHN” rather than “SKWUHN” like “one.” I think Mike’s pronunciation makes more sense given the spelling, but I kind of like SKWAHN. Anyway, it’s another option to test on your neighborhood baristas!
Samantha, you are correct, I have been pronouncing it "SKWAHN" which is obviously funnier than "SKWUHN" and also much easier to say. Mr. Sowden may take issue with this, but he's on the other side of the Atlantic so....
omg the Skwons 😂 you and Mike are the perfect international agents of chaos! Also, Eric Adams smacking rats with an imaginary hammer is an image that made me lol! And that photo! What a trio, should be the NYC Mayor’s Office Christmas Card. So fun, Anne!
Thanks Jolene! I'm glad you got a kick out of the photo too. It was in the Mayor's Twitter feed. A great NYC threesome, right? It WOULD make terrific xmas card for sure.
Thank you for the joy of skwon! I also suspect some fellow Brits would balk at the idea of different flavoured scones, like cranberry. I'm not one of them though! Thank you for this delight of a letter
Oh that's interesting. I just assumed different flavor scones was a universal but it totally makes sense that Americans would take a simple, classic item that is already perfect and try to improve it. That said, I DO think the cranberry scone is the best scone!
Always a blast. Lots of questions and observations raised
(1) When Jesse "the Body" Ventura was governor of MN, the big disappointment for some of us was he did not seek re-election. Will NYC clamor for more from their eclectic Mayor Adams?
(2) Does Adams typically need to be noticed so badly that he has name tags pinned on ala kindergarten on a field trip (photo at Katz's)
(3) Does Mayor Adams carry around $2 bills -- didn't know those were still a thing? (see photo)
(4) Pronunciation -- so fun! Asking for a friend is it "KAA" - "DET" or "CAY" - "DAY" or "CUH"-"DET" or "CAT" - "IT" or something else?
-It is hard to say about New Yorker and Eric Adams. I have never heard any New Yorker, in person, say they liked him. On the other hand, I don't think I've ever heard any New Yorker admit they liked any mayor. So this probably doesn't mean anything.
So FUN -- your family was a magic trick -- start out eastern European and become French with the stroke of a pen! One of the legs of my wife's family started out as Baaregaard and became Burger -- The former name also included those double dots over the A's -- It seems America was a land of re-invention. -- Just imagine the idiocy if the Cardinal { we are NOT related} had DOLAN stitched into the back of his skullcap (real gold thread I suppose)
“Those aren’t window cages. They’re fire escapes—from one apartment to the other,” she said.
OMG that is genius!! It just might provide an escape route during a fire!! Reminds me of when my brother went to college at Duquesne University, perched high on a cliff above the Monongahela River, or one of the other “Three Rivers” Pittsburghers are so gott-damned proud of! My brother was on the 20th floor of a high rise, right over the cliff; and my mom suggested we purchase a rope-ladder to send him off with, you know just in case of fire and you wanted to fall 10 to 15 feet less on your cascade from 20 stories and then bouncing off the rocks on the cliff before final entry into ONE of the gott-damned Three-Rivers!! LOL!!!
I was mortally offended when in an episode of 'Pioneer Woman' featuring lemon-flavoured triangular baked goods dipped in frosting, Ree Drummond announced: 'In Britain they call these SCONES!' (pronounced 's-cons'). No, Ree, we don't. What WE call 'scones' are round, not-all-that-sweet baked goods, to be served warm, split and thickly spread with clotted cream and strawberry jam - preferably in that order - alongside a cup of tea. A British scone is more like an American biscuit than those sweet triangular things.
Anyway, if 'scone' is pronounced to rhyme with 'cone' - *shudders* - that makes complete nonsense of one of my favourite jokes, which REQUIRES the correct pronunciation:
So wait. The triangular baked goods dipped on frosting. That is what Starbucks offers as a "scone." But it is not a scone. What do you call that thing?
I think outside of Starbucks, what bakeries and cafes offer in NYC are closer to what you'd think of as a scone. Except they are never round. They are often rather shapeless in fact, along the lines of the scone on the right in the photo I took (the one on the left is the Starbucks scone). Is it very important that they be roundy?
I'm not sure what I'd call the frosted triangular thing - I've never come across one apart from on Pioneer Woman, and certainly not in the wild over here...! But maybe triangular 'scones' HAVE made it across the pond? I don't know.
I'd say that a scone that you'd expect to be served as part of an afternoon tea would be round (for even baking), cut with a sharp cutter so that the scone can rise straight up and tall in the oven. That's always been the case in my experience. I've never seen one with corners like the one in your picture, perhaps because corners would catch more of the heat and dry out, maybe? 🤔
Does the person in the other apartment have to let you in?
Also: scones! I've been immersing myself in scone-baking videos now that I have an oven: not because scones are especially exciting (apart from the pronunciation debate) but because I just found out what Devonshire cream is, and if you have an oven and unpasteurized milk you can make it at home.
Jeff, that is an excellent question. I can imagine where people from either unit clamber out onto the fire escape simultaneously, and fight to get into each other's apartments.
I agree that scones are excellent DC conveyers. I disagree with your assessment that they are not exciting. But (and this is embarrassing to admit), I pretty much find ALL food exciting.
I am *becoming* excited about scones, mainly due to the videos. Also the fact that Devonshire cream produces leftover whey, which you can add to scone batter!
But until we have a refrigerator (and a bigger gas cylinder for the oven) I don't think I can make Devonshire cream, so everything is on hold.
“moofins” made me do a laughing spit-take. I hope one day to go to England and put “skwon” to the test at my first opportunity. Will report back.
Oh, to take "SWKON" to London! That did not occur to me, Laura. But now I have a REAL reason to live.
“One of my favorite pastimes is deliberately mispronouncing words. This is partially to test the person I am conversing with—will they let it slide?”
OMG!!! ME TOO!” I was a hospital pharmacist for 44 years and I would deliberately mispronounce words! Remember the movie “16 Candles” with Molly Ringwald? There was a character in that movie nicknamed “Farmer Ted.” So, after I saw the movie, instead of answering the phone, “Pharmacy, Frank Dundee speaking,” I’d answer it “Farmer Ted, Frank Dundee speaking!” In 20 phone calls, only one person said, “Farmer Ted?!”
ANOTHER STORY: The telephone operators at the hospital would page people overhead and this one day they announced, about 10 times, “Can a member of the “Anne Limbian” family call the Surgery Waiting Area?” So, I call the operator and ask, “Are you looking for a member of the amphibian family?” And the operator said, “NO!!! The Anne LIMBian family!!” And I said, “Oh, I thought maybe you wanted a turtle or an alligator to call the Surgery Waiting Area!” Then I said, “Oh! That’s VERY different! Never-mind,” like Emily Litella. https://youtu.be/OjYoNL4g5Vg
"moofins" that made me LOL!!!
I laughed out over your skwon conversations. Thanks for making my day!
Yay that makes me so happy! Thank you Pamela!
Yes.. So much fun! When you buy your skwon, don't pay with coins pay with Cwons.
LOL good one, Nick!
only old people have cwons!
Haaaa!!! LOL!!!
I promise to order Dole Whip in a cwon without first warning my family.
“Counter guy: “Skwon? No, we have muffins.”
I’ll bet the counter-help who knew you meant “scone” were experienced in retail bakery and realized that most people are goofs and they get the person exactly what they want but can’t pronounce. That was just so fun to hear about!
AKA skwonversations.
“One of my favorite pastimes is deliberately mispronouncing words. This is partially to test the person I am conversing with—will they let it slide?”
OMG!!! ME TOO!” I was a hospital pharmacist for 44 years and I would deliberately mispronounce words! Remember the movie “16 Candles” with Molly Ringwald? There was a character in that movie nicknamed “Farmer Ted.” So, after I saw the movie, instead of answering the phone, “Pharmacy, Frank Dundee speaking,” I’d answer it “Farmer Ted, Frank Dundee speaking!” In 20 phone calls, only one person said, “Farmer Ted?!”
ANOTHER STORY: The telephone operators at the hospital would page people overhead and this one day they announced, about 10 times, “Can a member of the “Anne Limbian” family call the Surgery Waiting Area?” So, I call the operator and ask, “Are you looking for a member of the amphibian family?” And the operator said, “NO!!! The Anne LIMBian family!!” And I said, “Oh, I thought maybe you wanted a turtle or an alligator to call the Surgery Waiting Area!” Then I said, “Oh! That’s VERY different! Never-mind,” like Emily Litella. https://youtu.be/OjYoNL4g5Vg
JRB you are so much worse than me!!!
BTW I just printed out a whole bunch of "Lost Cat" posters and will be out at 5 am tomorrow to hang them up in stealth. So excited!
OMG!! I passed out from glee!!
Once you've run out of entertainment, scone = scöne = "skirneh"
Try that. You're welcome.
Lol! I love the idea of saying that with more and more insistence, as if it made any sense at all.
There's no doubt that you're gonna have to commit and sell it. :D
What an epic packed Monday morning Cafe Anne. The fire department fire escape is something I'm familiar with. Although it does look wacky, high rise apartment buildings are fire resistant. If a fire breaks out in someones residence, the fire should stay contained to that section until the FD shows up. That's of course not always the case like if someone leaves their door open and it gets out into the hallway (the Bronx deadly fire recently was a good example of this). I don't think I've seen too many escapes like that in NJ but it another resource for residence. Happy Monday!
I feel like I DID put a lot into this one, Justin. Thank you! And also for the lesson in high-rise construction features, haha. Happy Monday!
“Those aren’t window cages. They’re fire escapes—from one apartment to the other,” she said.
OMG that is genius!! It just might provide an escape route during a fire!! Reminds me of when my brother went to college at Duquesne University, perched high on a cliff above the Monongahela River, or one of the other “Three Rivers” Pittsburghers are so gott-damned proud of! My brother was on the 20th floor of a high rise, right over the cliff; and my mom suggested we purchase a rope-ladder to send him off with, you know just in case of fire and you wanted to fall 10 to 15 feet less on your cascade from 20 stories and then bouncing off the rocks on the cliff before final entry into ONE of the gott-damned Three-Rivers!! LOL!!!
Deliberate mispronunciation is such a great idea! Thank you for this inspiring email. I am already considering ways to add this to my life.
Do you ever let on that it's deliberate or acknowledge the true pronunciation when someone points it out, or do you just pretend that they didn't say anything? Do you argue that you're correct? How does it typically play out when you get pushback?
Great question LH! When I am corrected, I always thank them for correcting me. That step is the most fun of all.
I'm leaning more toward something like, "Oh really? In Serbia we say it _____." And then when I eventually accidentally run into a Serbian, I'll just claim that I said Siberian, and am specifically referring to aboriginal Siberian and not Russian. Do you speak it? Holuchnik!"
“I have said "scone" (rhymes with "gone"), but only to be contrary and disingenuous and drive everyone crazy by pronouncing it wrong.”
That’s so hilarious!! The Universe punked you, Anne!!
When I first read “SKWON,” in my head it was “SKWAHN” rather than “SKWUHN” like “one.” I think Mike’s pronunciation makes more sense given the spelling, but I kind of like SKWAHN. Anyway, it’s another option to test on your neighborhood baristas!
Samantha, you are correct, I have been pronouncing it "SKWAHN" which is obviously funnier than "SKWUHN" and also much easier to say. Mr. Sowden may take issue with this, but he's on the other side of the Atlantic so....
I hereby pledge to always and forever only order "moofins." And with that I shall order a grande oat milk lattie.
Top of the moofin to you, Michael!
Well now you're just being silly! 😎
omg the Skwons 😂 you and Mike are the perfect international agents of chaos! Also, Eric Adams smacking rats with an imaginary hammer is an image that made me lol! And that photo! What a trio, should be the NYC Mayor’s Office Christmas Card. So fun, Anne!
Thanks Jolene! I'm glad you got a kick out of the photo too. It was in the Mayor's Twitter feed. A great NYC threesome, right? It WOULD make terrific xmas card for sure.
Yes! Would love to have heard their lunch conversation which no doubt was loud and full of laughs!
*walks up, lifts small device, device flashes, Jolene forgets entire conversation and goes away to bake something*
The Agents of International Chaos must ALWAYS do their work in secret. Don't tell your friends.
- Agent Sowden
“…goes away to bake something.” 😂 Well done, Sowden!
*fiddles with mind-wipe device* Dammit, this usually works....
Ha!
Thank you for the joy of skwon! I also suspect some fellow Brits would balk at the idea of different flavoured scones, like cranberry. I'm not one of them though! Thank you for this delight of a letter
Oh that's interesting. I just assumed different flavor scones was a universal but it totally makes sense that Americans would take a simple, classic item that is already perfect and try to improve it. That said, I DO think the cranberry scone is the best scone!
Always a blast. Lots of questions and observations raised
(1) When Jesse "the Body" Ventura was governor of MN, the big disappointment for some of us was he did not seek re-election. Will NYC clamor for more from their eclectic Mayor Adams?
(2) Does Adams typically need to be noticed so badly that he has name tags pinned on ala kindergarten on a field trip (photo at Katz's)
(3) Does Mayor Adams carry around $2 bills -- didn't know those were still a thing? (see photo)
(4) Pronunciation -- so fun! Asking for a friend is it "KAA" - "DET" or "CAY" - "DAY" or "CUH"-"DET" or "CAT" - "IT" or something else?
Mr. Dolan!
-It is hard to say about New Yorker and Eric Adams. I have never heard any New Yorker, in person, say they liked him. On the other hand, I don't think I've ever heard any New Yorker admit they liked any mayor. So this probably doesn't mean anything.
-He ALWAYS wears this jacket that says "Mayor Adams" on the front, and on the back it says "NYC MAYOR." https://www.ny1.com/nyc/all-boroughs/politics/2022/11/10/did-adam-s-message-on-crime-boost-the-gop-
-Not sure if he was carrying those bills around or if they were offered by the people who got his autograph. Good eye! I noticed that too!
-Kah-DET! When the family boated over it was Kadetski (Kadetsky?) but they left the ski in the Atlantic.
So FUN -- your family was a magic trick -- start out eastern European and become French with the stroke of a pen! One of the legs of my wife's family started out as Baaregaard and became Burger -- The former name also included those double dots over the A's -- It seems America was a land of re-invention. -- Just imagine the idiocy if the Cardinal { we are NOT related} had DOLAN stitched into the back of his skullcap (real gold thread I suppose)
Thanks for making me laugh out loud several times! Moofins!
And this:
'It’s a unique escape system that sends you right back into the burning building.'
I feel there's some metaphor about the modern world here ...
LOL I did not think of that Maura but you are absolutely right!
“Those aren’t window cages. They’re fire escapes—from one apartment to the other,” she said.
OMG that is genius!! It just might provide an escape route during a fire!! Reminds me of when my brother went to college at Duquesne University, perched high on a cliff above the Monongahela River, or one of the other “Three Rivers” Pittsburghers are so gott-damned proud of! My brother was on the 20th floor of a high rise, right over the cliff; and my mom suggested we purchase a rope-ladder to send him off with, you know just in case of fire and you wanted to fall 10 to 15 feet less on your cascade from 20 stories and then bouncing off the rocks on the cliff before final entry into ONE of the gott-damned Three-Rivers!! LOL!!!
Skwon?! 🤣 LOVE THIS!
I was mortally offended when in an episode of 'Pioneer Woman' featuring lemon-flavoured triangular baked goods dipped in frosting, Ree Drummond announced: 'In Britain they call these SCONES!' (pronounced 's-cons'). No, Ree, we don't. What WE call 'scones' are round, not-all-that-sweet baked goods, to be served warm, split and thickly spread with clotted cream and strawberry jam - preferably in that order - alongside a cup of tea. A British scone is more like an American biscuit than those sweet triangular things.
Anyway, if 'scone' is pronounced to rhyme with 'cone' - *shudders* - that makes complete nonsense of one of my favourite jokes, which REQUIRES the correct pronunciation:
What's the fastest cake in the world? SCONE!
🤣
So wait. The triangular baked goods dipped on frosting. That is what Starbucks offers as a "scone." But it is not a scone. What do you call that thing?
I think outside of Starbucks, what bakeries and cafes offer in NYC are closer to what you'd think of as a scone. Except they are never round. They are often rather shapeless in fact, along the lines of the scone on the right in the photo I took (the one on the left is the Starbucks scone). Is it very important that they be roundy?
Last but not least, I don't get joke!!!
Oh wait, I just got it! Ah, good one.
I'm not sure what I'd call the frosted triangular thing - I've never come across one apart from on Pioneer Woman, and certainly not in the wild over here...! But maybe triangular 'scones' HAVE made it across the pond? I don't know.
I'd say that a scone that you'd expect to be served as part of an afternoon tea would be round (for even baking), cut with a sharp cutter so that the scone can rise straight up and tall in the oven. That's always been the case in my experience. I've never seen one with corners like the one in your picture, perhaps because corners would catch more of the heat and dry out, maybe? 🤔
Yay re the joke! I got you! 🤣🙌😉
Does the person in the other apartment have to let you in?
Also: scones! I've been immersing myself in scone-baking videos now that I have an oven: not because scones are especially exciting (apart from the pronunciation debate) but because I just found out what Devonshire cream is, and if you have an oven and unpasteurized milk you can make it at home.
But I need scones to put the Devonshire cream on.
Jeff, that is an excellent question. I can imagine where people from either unit clamber out onto the fire escape simultaneously, and fight to get into each other's apartments.
I agree that scones are excellent DC conveyers. I disagree with your assessment that they are not exciting. But (and this is embarrassing to admit), I pretty much find ALL food exciting.
I am *becoming* excited about scones, mainly due to the videos. Also the fact that Devonshire cream produces leftover whey, which you can add to scone batter!
But until we have a refrigerator (and a bigger gas cylinder for the oven) I don't think I can make Devonshire cream, so everything is on hold.
This is the best scone video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y1xpm2XraU8
I watched Jamie Oliver's before this one and I thought you needed special Jamie Oliver bakeware to make a scone. This lady doesn't even cut them out!
Terrific video!! Thanks!
I live in the UK, play hard and fast with scone (cone) and scone (gone), and will also now begin dropping in skwons. SO IT BEGINS.
Rah! It's sweeping the globe!
The game is afoot then, both sides of the pond!
Skwon. It's beautiful in its lunacy. Your mischievous glow is one I would love to bask in.
Oh wow Justin—I love the idea of something being beautiful in its lunacy!
I love blueberry skwons and blueberry moofins!!! Hilarious, Anne! 😄
BB Skwons and Moofins 4ever! Thank you Nathalie!