Hello everyone,
Welcome to Issue #142 of CAFÉ ANNE!
So in last week’s issue, I asked my favorite AI bot, DALL-E 3, to create a logo for the new CAFÉ ANNE Rat Pack Think Tank. It generated four options, and I asked you to vote for your favorite.
The voting was fast and furious, and the results are in:
Option D, which won the popular vote, also spurred the most favorable reviews in the comments.
“I voted for Option D because I feel that third “N” really adds a lot to your journalistic credibility and also gives the whole thing a regal air,” wrote Andrea N.
“As an annoying graphic designer, I feel I must point out that the first option is more of an illustration rather than a logo,” wrote Laura. “Option D is clearly the most elegant and versatile choice!”
Therry N., however, did not mind that the first image, which came in a close second, wasn’t really a logo. “Option A!” She wrote. “With its strong hint of Tammany Hall imagery, it's got me going!”
But my favorite comment came from Ada who wrote, “God grant me the confident audacity of an AI that will spell however the hell fits.”
Right on, Ada! In the end, I followed my initial impulse and went on the advice of Nancy F. who wrote, “I voted for the logo with no typos, although just for giggles, and to emphasize the AI-ness, you could choose the logo with the *most* typos.”
So yes. Although it came in dead last in the poll, with just 13% of the vote, I am defying you all and choosing Option B.
I love Option B so much for the following reasons:
It misspells “CAFÉ” as “CAAFE”. What?
It misspells my name “ANNE,” as “ANANE,” and also includes an additional mystery “letter” that is possibly a symbol from an alphabet employed by folks on some other planet.
It misspells “RAT” as “RATK” and “THINK” as “THNK”.
It screws up the actual name of the organization, omitting the word “PACK”.
It incorporates, for no fathomable reason, a game card motif, and the card graphics make no sense. What is a “T2” card, and how does it function in a poker hand? Also, what’s up with card #3, with its deformed club and pair of cherries? Is that a sex thing? So many questions!
In other news, NYC-Drought-Continues shoutouts to this week’s new paid subscribers Steve, Pete S., LeAnne and Katie H. And double shoutouts to Christine who sprang for a $100 founding membership. All told, that’s enough $$$ to stock up on a 12-day supply of Poland Spring at the bodega! And as you know, everything on CAFÉ ANNE will always be free for everyone, but I can’t continue without the generous support of the sweethearts who opt to pay anyway. Much appreciated!
I am very excited for this week’s issue, of course. We’ve got an account of my adventure checking out the newly remodeled Capital One Café, the hottest bank-owned coffee spot in the city.
Regards!
Anne
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FEATURE
New York’s Nicest Café is a @#$*% Bank!
I was surprised recently to learn that the Capital One Café, the coffee spot on Union Square owned by a giant bank, just got a major expansion and renovation. I remember when the place first opened in 2015. I rolled my eyes and gave it a few years at most. No one, I was certain, would order a cappuccino from a bank. Wrong again! It's since outlasted the hundreds of NYC cafés that opened their doors around the same time.
I should have considered the fact the café is backed by a $70 billion bank that controls more than 10% of the U.S. credit card market. Last year, Capital One made a $5 billion profit. It can afford to subsidize a money-losing café.
But here's the thing. Capital One wouldn't keep the café running all these years if it wasn't somehow adding to the bottom line. It must be attracting plenty of customers. Which begs the question—in a city offering more than 3,500 cafes including 322 Starbucks, a dozen local chains, and indy spots with cool vibes up the wazoo, why would anyone choose a café associated with checking accounts and car loans?
Last week, I set out to solve the mystery. I spent the morning at the Capital One Café.
You can't deny it's conveniently located, right at the corner of Broadway and Union Square South. Union Square, of course, is one of the city's most vibrant, bustling parks, surrounded by shopping and served by the 14th St-Union Square station, the city's fifth-busiest train stop. This is not cheap real estate. Given the neighborhood's lease rates, the rent on the 15,000 square-foot space is easily several million a year.
And once I got through the vestibule, with its two ATMs, I was impressed by what may be the most spacious, airy coffee spot in the city. The cafe's multi-story interior, which seats 120, is middlebrow sleek, in an Apple Store-meets-JFK Terminal 4 kind of way.
The first floor features three seating areas, each with a different vibe (co-working space-ish, livingroom-ish and standard cafe-ish). Soft pop plays over the speakers. Potted plants loom over wingback chairs. The place has a pleasant, peaceful buzz. When I logged onto the free wifi, the greeting encouraged me to "Grab a coffee and find your zen."
In an email response to my questions, Jennifer Windbeck, head of Capital One Retail Bank Channels & Operations, said the bank aimed for a "clean, minimal design with a color palette that is powerful enough to draw people in, and calming enough to put them at ease."
I think they nailed it. It was, in many ways, an ideal café. But not in a way you could fall in love with. Because it never lets you forget who you're dealing with.
A kiosk offers free bookmarks promoting various banking products including something called "Spark Cash Plus”. LED screens encourage customers to download the Capital One shopping app, while cardboard stands on the tables announce "$250 bonus; goodbye fees and minimums for depositing money!" Pinkerton security guards patrol the stairwell. Security cameras are everywhere.
Upstairs, guests enjoy impressive views of Union Square from floor-to-ceiling windows. But there is also, in the back, an actual bank with four teller windows.
I chatted with a couple customers upstairs including Tom, who works in finance and was waiting to meet a friend. This was his first visit, he said, and the location was not his idea.
"I'm wondering why, with thousands of cafés in the city, someone would pick one run by a bank," I told him.
"I think it's just the convenience," he said. "It's a surprisingly good space. You could go to Gregorys, but then there's just a couple of seats, and it's jammed. Or you could go to a very nice cafe if you wanted to be sure to get a table. But this is informal and quick."
He looked around.
"It's a little weird," he added. "Just weird being in a bank."
So how's the coffee?
The first floor espresso bar serves Verve coffee and your standard array of sandwiches and baked goods. Prices for items like drip coffee, cappuccino and moofins were close to those charged by the Starbucks across the street. A 12-oz drip coffee is 4.25, a croissant is $3.75. I ordered a large latte for $6.
"Are you using a Capital One card?" asked the barista.
"What?" I said.
"Are you using a Capital One card?"
"No," I said. "Do you get a discount if you do?"
"Mmm-hmm," said the barista. "Fifty percent. Just the drinks."
Golly. Half-price drinks. Jeeze. I did some Anne Math. Given my cappuccino habit, that'd save me about $600 a year. All I'd have to do is get a Capital One card.
While waiting for my drink, I chatted with one of the very friendly "Café Ambassadors" stationed by the stairs. I told her I write a blog and asked why someone would go to a café owned by a bank. She laughed and nodded. "Anyone is welcome, you don't have to be a Capital One customer," she said. "We have wifi! We have a restroom, we have a water station, we have two floors!"
Bank customers can reserve one of the cafe's two conference rooms for meetings, she continued. You could easily use the café as a co-working space.
All I'd have to do is get a Capital One card.
And the latte, by the way, was pretty good! Not that I'm much of a coffee connoisseur. But Marina, a customer working in the back lounge, assured me the coffee is excellent. "I'm from Italy," she said, "And the cappuccino's really good. Better than Italy."
Megan, PhD student sipping a cortado, said she is a Capital One customer and started going when she heard about the half-price coffee. She gets some flack from her friends.
"There are some people who say a corporate entity, like a bank—this feels antithetical to their perception of what a coffee shop should be—a local kind of place, that's much smaller," she said. "And I would feel bad if I was exclusively coming here."
Her favorite café is The Plug way up in her own neighborhood, Washington Heights. "You might miss it if you walk by," she said. “But all the people are really nice. It's one of those places where the baristas know everybody who walks in the door."
She goes to the Capital One café on her own, she continued, and to indy spots like The Plug with her friends. "So I feel like I spend enough money on coffee, that I'm supporting people!"
Kaaron, who lives in Midwood and has an admin job at a nearby university, was reading a Matthew Perry bio while sipping a medium coffee with soy milk. She's cut way back on her coffee habit thanks to inflation, she said. But here, she can afford the half-price drinks.
"It's very relaxed and friendly," she said. "I like that. I could just sit here and play on my phone and read my book, and nobody's rushing me out. And I spent under three bucks for a cup of coffee. How many places are like that? It's hard to even get a park bench where somebody isn't staring at you, wanting your seat."
I nodded sympathetically. It's true. In New York City, there's often no place to sit. My favorite spot, the Little Sweet Café in Boerum Hill, is the size of a closet, with four tiny tables. It's a lucky day when I can find a seat. If I stay too long nursing my coffee, I get the evil eye. And who can blame them?
My local Starbucks in Brooklyn Heights, meanwhile, recently closed for renovations and reopened with half the seating. The chain replaced the comfy benches and broad tables with awkward little chairs and café tables. "Hostile architecture" is the operative term here, I believe.
The Capital One Café, meanwhile, had open seats galore, to suit any taste. Chairs! Stools! Benches! Booths! Sofas!
"I have to say, I feel really torn because I love little mom-and-pop spots, and you want to support them, but this place is so nice," I told Kaaron.
"A lot of my favorite places are going under since Covid," Kaaron agreed. "They didn't bounce back. And people are like, 'Support them! They're struggling!' But who's supporting me? I'm struggling! I can't keep every mom-and-pop coffee shop open, honestly."
The last customer I spoke to was Afrikka, a mental health and substance abuse counselor occupying a comfy sofa in the front room. She comes to the Capital One Café every day to relax and charge her phone.
"When you come in, you don't feel stiff, you know what I'm saying?" she said. "It's like being at home, kind of. Some of the college students, they come in, I don't like that they put their feet up. They put their feet up on the seat. They forget it's a public place."
"It feels that much like home," I observed.
"Sometimes too much!" said Afrikka. "They forget their dirty socks and stuff. It's understandable. But they clean it. I've been here when they clean it. They clean it very good. The only thing is the bathroom."
"What about it?" I asked.
Afrikka explained that since the bathroom is open to everyone, it's sometimes a bit of a mess, and there's often a long queue. "You waiting in line, you better bring a diaper with you!" she said.
I later gave the bathroom a quick inspection, by the way, and it was indeed strewn with toilet paper. It also featured loud, droning, new age music. I took a little video so you can get the full effect:
Afrikka, however, said the bathroom situation was minor complaint given the fact that this was one of the few places in the city where anyone can find a seat, charge their phone and get free wifi without spending a dime.
"So this is really where a lot of people come in, as you see, a lot of college students, and the business people come here too," she said. "They do their money making right here! You can hear them making money on their computer. Stocks! Ka-ching! You can hear it!"
"Did you even buy a coffee today?" I asked.
"No, I got to be honest, I'm not going to lie," she said. "But you don't have to buy a coffee. That's the beautiful thing. As long as you're respectful, you can charge your phone, or you can bring food in from other restaurants. They don't mind."
"Just a little secret," she added. "They're a bank, so eventually you come in, you might decide you want to bank with Capital One, right? That's why they do that."
The folks at Capital One might not put it that way, exactly. In her email response, Jennifer Windbeck, the Capital One exec, said the bank's cafés are primarily meant to serve as "community hubs."
"Additionally, our cafés provide both ‘human help’ and great self-service options like advanced ATMs to Capital One customers," she added. "Our goal is to provide the services customers need to achieve financial wellbeing and drive financial confidence."
Top that, Starbucks!
While Ms. Windbeck declined to say how many new accounts are generated by the cafes, she did note that the bank is opening new café locations at Columbus Circle this week and in SoHo and Fordham Road in the Bronx in 2025.
I did a little research on my own, meanwhile, and was interested to learn how much a new bank customer can be worth. According to stats from industry bank consultants, the lifetime value of a typical deposit account customer ranges from $2,000 to $4,500 while a credit card customer is worth $1,000 to $10,000. If the customer opts for additional products like auto loans and mortgages, the life-time relationship value can range from $10,000 to $50,000.
Maybe Capital One should be paying us to drink their coffee.
Mulling this over, I realized what the Capital One Café reminds me of: Las Vegas!
I've only been there once, on a business trip, but I was struck by how much fun you could have in Sin City without spending a dime, thanks to all the bonkers displays—gardens, galleries, fountains and stage shows—provided by the casinos to lure people in. The whole city is one big spectacle. And I can personally attest: they can't make you gamble!
The Capital One Café, meanwhile, provides that rare commodity in NYC—a calm, peaceful place to take a break—that is open to all. I will definitely be back the next time I stop by Madman Espresso, my go-to café in the Union Square area—and find once again that there's no place to sit.
Before I wrapped up my conversation with Afrikka, by the way, I asked if hanging out at the Capital One Café every day had convinced her to become a Capital One customer.
"No,' she said firmly. "I'm a Chase customer."
"Do you think this might get you to switch?"
"Nope, I'm old school," she said. "I'm one of those people. If it ain't broke, don't need to fix it."
CAFÉ ANNE is a free weekly newsletter created by Brooklyn journalist Anne Kadet. Subscribe to get the latest issue every Monday.
At some point I'd like to see a cafe expand into financial services.
First off, that video and accompanying soundtrack is gold! I have never felt so soothed and disgusted at the same time. Second, Capitol One seems like the perfect place to finally introduce Camel Milk coffee drinks to New York City. "What's in your latte?"